Just because you’re middle-aged doesn’t mean you and your partner shouldn’t be waking up your neighbors with your bedroom, um, behavior.

Holistic wellness and sex expert Kim Anami wants you to know intimacy can be a path to enlightenment and not just one reserved for young people. Her coaching focuses on helping people from all age groups get excited about sex as a means to “self-healing, rejuvenation, and transcendence.”

Through her coaching, Anami often encounters the myth that sexuality is reserved for the young. It’s something she tries hard to debunk. “We can be mature adults and enjoy sex — having a voracious sexual appetite and using it in a healthy, productive, and powerful way,” she said. 

Kim Anami Tells Clients of All Ages to Set Higher Sexual Expectations

Today’s popular culture perpetuates the idea that only young and beautiful people are worthy of good sex, which gets in the way of far too many adults experiencing the joys of intimacy, expression, and connection. 

Anami said the cultural norms that have come out of such views have supplanted natural impulses, including naturally high libido, and set the bar far too low for older couples. “If you’ve been told that it’s normal to have good sex for two years and then for the rest of your marriage it’s going to be not so good, you’ll assume that’s just the way it is.” 

Anami has built her career around the idea that everyone deserves a healthy and exciting sex life. She coaches people on how to reset expectations and dispel the idea that sex has to be lackluster or unsatisfying for people who’ve entered middle age and beyond. “People don’t realize that their sex and intimate lives are capable of growth, evolution, and gratification. They can have sex wherever they are in their lives and have it be completely fulfilling and beautiful,” she said. 

Anami’s message is one of hope: Sexuality is a life journey, and anyone is capable of growing their physical and emotional connections. Although a plateau in a relationship or personal sexual exploration is seen as a step backward, she sees it as one part of a long process of self-discovery. 

Sexual Connection and Energy in Midlife and Beyond with Kim Anami

Finding ways to evolve in one’s sexual life is a multipronged process that starts with understanding and acceptance. “People will hit a wall in their growth, and they don’t know the next steps to take,” Anami said. She offers resources online and through guided practices that help mature adults learn more about their needs or their partner’s desires. 

Anami believes a big part of the evolution process is remaining open to the transformational forces at play. “If you’re not tuned in to that energy, you’re operating at a deficiency,” she says. 

By allowing themselves to be vulnerable, Anami believes people from all ages can discover the power of rewarding sex. “[It’s] a way to heal and revitalize ourselves, to channel our creative energy out into the world.”

Once they’ve harnessed their sexual energy, Anami believes individuals can feel more confident to express to their partners what gives them pleasure and what does not. That assuredness transcends the bedroom and allows people to demand more — creatively and professionally as well. And achieving this level of self-awareness in sex and life transcends the boundaries of age. “It’s an intrinsic internal motivation and inspiration rather than an external one,” Anami said.  

Does age affect the quality of your sex life?

Share your thoughts and comments with us.

“PIN & SHARE”